


Sleep

by BandsforBreakfast



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Insomnia, M/M, Other, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-08
Updated: 2015-02-08
Packaged: 2018-03-11 03:24:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3312122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BandsforBreakfast/pseuds/BandsforBreakfast
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler couldn't sleep. </p><p>Then, Josh.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleep

Tyler couldn't sleep.

 

This is not just something that's happening right now; it is a fact. 

 

Tyler couldn't sleep, and there was nothing he could do about it. He had tried everything: meditation, different eating patterns, all sorts of tea, taking baths, medication, but none of it worked. Nothing ever worked. 

 

Tyler couldn't sleep. As the sky outside grew darker, so did his thoughts. When the lights were turned off, his happy-mask came off. The sun went down, and down went Tyler. Down, down he fell, spiraling into this aggressive darkness, down into the endless, screaming void. It was there, waiting for him in the shadows. Like an awfully faithful spouse, it always stayed up for him, waited for Tyler to climb into bed. It wrapped its arms around him, at first feeling like a welcome hug but then it grew tighter and tighter, gripping his hands and limbs and it seeped into his body, hurting his stomach and blocking his lungs, but most of all, the darkness would climb into his head.

 

 Tyler couldn't sleep, because

it 

wouldn't 

leave

him

alone.

 

Squeezing his eyes shut, he tried to block it out, he tried to force it out by repeatedly ramming his hands against the side of his head. But it was no use.

 

His skull couldn't hold all that was inside it. Tyler wanted to bash his head in. He cried, tears flowing freely over his wet face, dripping onto his pillow. He silently screamed his throat sore, his knees were up to his chest and his fists were clenched, gripping his hair or his pillow or his mattress or his blanket or anything, and he pushed and pulled and raged and yet, nothing worked.

 

And Tyler fell backwards onto his pillow, sobbing.

 

And Tyler couldn't sleep.

 

 

 Tyler wrote, though. That helped. It gave him sombody to scream at.

 

 

Then Tyler quit basketball.

Then Tyler started a band.

Then Tyler met Josh.

Josh was a sleeper.

 

 

Tyler couldn't sleep. He was battling his mind, fighting the chaos, when there was a buzz- and everything froze. 

 

Another buzz.

 

In confusion, Tyler grabbed his phone off the night stand. Two new text messages. 

 

 

[Josh 02:32] Hey, you awake?

 

[Josh 02:32] Can't sleep.

 

 

Tyler just stared at the bright screen in front of his eyes. He didn't know what to say.

 

 _Same_ , he wrote. Send. 

 

It only took seconds for Josh to reply.

 

[Josh 02:38] There's just so many things in my head...

 

[You 02:38] And they won't shut up.

 

[Josh 02:39] Exactly.

 

And so the conversation went on. At some point, when the text messages became too long to fit inside only one message box, Josh called Tyler. 

 

"I guess it'd be easier to just... talk." he had said. 

 

And talk they did. Tyler shared, he shared all that he was going through, and Josh listened. And Josh shared all of his troubles, and Tyler listened. He whispered his frustrations into the phone, trying to hold back tears, while the presence on the other side absorbed it all. And it didn't disapprove. And it didn't ask whether he had tried this or that, and had he been to a doctor already? or maybe he was just asking for attention, being dramatic, overreacting.

 

Josh said none of these things. Josh listened, Josh accepted, Josh believed his emotions were real and valid and it was not his fault. Josh believed there was a dark haze watching over him, standing over his shoulder, commenting om everything he did. Josh didn't judge him. They talked, talked, and then his room got lighter and the sun rose. 

 

"The sun is rising." Tyler said.

 

"It is." Josh confirmed.

 

Tyler sighed. "You know, that was better than any therapist I have ever visited."

 

"I know, that's why I charge fifty dollars an hour."

 

Tyler snorted. "I've got to go soon though. Stuff to do."

 

A sound emerged from the phone. It might have been a yawn. "Okay. Then I might take an early morning nap." Josh joked.

 

"I guess this is goodbye then, Joshua." 

 

"Goodbye, Tyler. Call me if you need me. And stay alive."

Then there was a click, and the conversation was over. 

 

 

Tyler couldn't sleep. It seemed now that he understood what was going on, it was torturing him even worse. How painful it was to know what was coming, it already hurt just thinking about the monster hunting him. 

 

He still wrote about it. For some reason writing helped. It wasn't that he _wanted_  to write, he _had_  to. His head was filled with all these words and if he didn't put them on paper they would be lost forever, and that could never happen. The words held power. The words put the demons in a cage. The words punched a tiny hole in the great dark pack of clouds. The words made the big terrifying thing a little less scary.

 

 

 

Tyler couldn't sleep. One day he was over at Josh's, and the weather had turned very dark. It was cold, the wind and lightning were working together in a storming way, ripping branches off trees, snapping lamp posts in half, setting houses ablaze. 

 

"Yeah, you're not going home tonight." Josh had announced. "The minute you go outside you'll be blown away."

 

Tyler laughed at him, but he agreed. They watched another movie, and by the time that was finished it was already very late, so they went upstairs. 

 

"Okay I have an air mattress, but I really don't want to spend half the night blowing that up." Josh said.

 

Tyler looked at the one-person bed. "Well, I guess I'll just sleep next to you then." he said, a smile showing through. 

 

Josh shot him a joking look of exaggerated disgust, sending him into a burst of laughter. 

 

"Why not, bro?" he exclaimed, "we're buds!"

 

That send Josh laughing too, and he spat out a "fine" before walking over to the closet and throwing Tyler a pair of sweatpants and a shirt to sleep in. Josh put his own on too, and crawled into bed, leaving Tyler to turn off the lights. 

 

But the very second it got dark, a flash of fear shot through Tyler's body. He could already feel his muscles tighten as he walked over to the bed. Josh probably really didn't want him here. He was being verg annoying. He was a burden. His hand had already lifted up the covers to slide in, but now it froze mid-air. Maybe he'd just lie on the floor. Or go home, the rain isn't *that* bad. He could-

 

"Tyler, get in, I'm getting cold." Josh muttered from under the covers.

 

"Josh..." Tyler whispered. "maybe it's better if I-if I went home."

 

"What? That's ridiculous. Get in, now."

 

"But I can just-"

 

"Get. In. The. Bed." Josh demanded. 

 

Tyler gave up and did as he was told. Immediately, he felt Josh's arm embrace him tightly, pulling him closer.

 

"Tyler," Josh whispered, looking intently into his eyes, "please believe me. You are not a problem. You are not a burden. In fact, you are quite warm, which is pretty nice." 

 

It stirred a lot of emotions inside of Tyler and he smiled, trying to hold back tears.

He curled up into a ball and shuffled closer to big, safe Josh. His head was against Joshs chest, and he could feel his heartbeat. Josh's heartbeat was there. Josh's heartbeat filled up his head. Josh's steady, calming heartbeat droned out all of the bad thoughts. Josh's heartbeat was there. Josh was there.

Tyler fell asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Oooo okay I haven't written many serious fics like this before, that aren't just *omf they're so in love they're gonna kiss*, so it'd be brilliant if you left a comment telling me what you think!


End file.
